from oscar to grouch

Last night was the big night in Hollywood. After the big movie marathon, I was anxious to see who would win awards and who would be ROBBED. Although, it is my opinion that Jim Carrey was robbed long before the award show started. While I appreciated that Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind received two nods for best actress and best screenplay, I believe Carrey should have been nominated. Though I realize he would have had no chance against this year's other nominees.
My movie-obsessed friend held her annual Oscar party. Every year I look forward to this party. Mostly I look forward to the invitation to the party. She creatively incorporates nominated films into the entire invitation. It is pretty amazing. See the best evite ever post.
And so I responded to her evite, letting her know that I was attending, wearing a formal, BEING JULIA and sitting SIDEWAYS. Why should movie stars be the only one to dress up for the Oscars? Though there was no red carpet, there was lots of fanciness. My most non-fancy friend not only donned a formal, but also sported an updo and a tiara. Her tiara-good. Scarlett Johansson's- bad. My dress looked very similar to the one worn by Julia Roberts the year she won her Academy Award. I looked just as excited when I won my award. There was no actual statue, but I did tie for having the most Oscar win predictions. The ballot that had who I wanted to win didn't look as good.
Overall it was a fun night. Though with the long-winded speeches of some of the winners, especially the sound people, the show ended later than my old lady bed time. As a result I was tired all day. And as a result, I was extremely short-tempered. One might even say that Oscar made me grouchy.

best evite ever

One of my best friends, Scarlett Morrow, sent the following invitation to her annual Oscar party.

INCREDIBLES,

I should have sent this YESTERDAY, but AUTISM IS A WORLD I live in, so I didn’t get around to it . . .

As we come CLOSER to Spring, the Oscars provide a RAY of ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND during the cold bleak of winter. EVERYTHING IN THIS COUNTRY MUST come to a standstill on Oscar night!

This event has been SISTER ROSE’S PASSION (as well as I, ROBOT’s) for the past 5 years. To celebrate such please dress in your Oscar best as the event will be formal (those sporting jeans will be allowed in, but perhaps looked at SIDEWAYS)

So as to avoid LEMONY SNICKET’S A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS here are the directions for FINDING NEVERLAND at the HOUSE OF FLYING DAGGERS located at Shady Brook Lane in THE VILLAGE.

There is a gate, but no code so SEA INSIDE and SHARK TALE someone else in or call me and I’ll go let you in.

The party will start twelve hours after 7:35 IN THE MORNING, but not BEFORE SUNSET.

AS IT IS IN HEAVEN, and by a TWIST OF FAITH, I go to church on Sunday night. So as not to further contribute to my spiritual DOWNFALL, I will attend church, hear the CHORUS, listen to the PASSION OF THE CHRIST (told through the STORY OF THE WEEPING CAMEL), learn of the lesser known resurrection - TUPAC: RESURRECTION, and race home for the ceremony.

Never fear! I will tape the first thirty minutes of the show for us to watch during commercials or at the end of the ceremony.

There will be no COLLATERAL necessary for admission, but please let me know if you plan to join us! I need to know if I need to spend a MILLION DOLLAR BABY and GOPHER BROKE on snacks, but not have too many leftovers so as to SUPER SIZE ME!

Because the show is A VERY LONG ENGAGEMENT, please feel free to consider my place (while lacking in HARDWOOD floors) your HOTEL RWANDA if you’re from out of town and used an AVIATOR, the POLAR EXPRESS, rode the MOTORCYCLE DIARIES, had TWO CARS, ONE NIGHT, and/or endured MIGHTY TIMES: THE CHILDREN’S MARCH to get here.

Please feel free to invite LORENZO, RYAN, TROY, VERA DRAKE, the PHANTOM OF THE OPERA, BIRTHDAY BOYs, KINSEY, HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN, WASPs, and SPIDERMAN 2. Oh yeah, and SHREK 2!

I may have left CHILDREN OF LENINGRADSKY off the list, so please extend this invite to others, but leave any LITTLE TERRORISTs who were BORN INTO BROTHELS at home.

another rant

I hate email forwards. Especially the ones that are sappy and about love and relationships. Inevitably at the end of those emails, are the words "Send this to 2 people you know and the guy you like will notice you. Send this to 10 people you know and he will talk to you. Send this to everyone you know and maybe he will ask you out. Warning: failure to send this will place a curse on your romantic life forever and you will never have another date." Or something like that.
I never send the forwards. And lately I've become suspicious that this is my problem. The guys in my life are content to talk about dating, but not actually date. They make plans without ever actually make a plan. They are caught in the cycle of planning the plan for "hanging out."
And what is with "hanging out"? I had enough of that in college. Dating didn't exist at Baylor. No one I knew seemed to be dating. They were just "hanging out" with guys. What happened to dating? Has it become an outdated ritual? Hey, I love to hang out. If we are just friends...
But dating implies there in an intentional desire to get to know a person. And if it happens to involve dinner and movie, I enjoy those things, too.

lollipops for Jesus

Last Friday was my class Valentine Party. As the cupcakes, chips and candy were passed out, one of my students offered me a heart sucker he had received in his Valentine box. Then another student offered explanation saying, "He gave up lollipops for Jesus!"
I asked my student if he often ate lollipops, and he told me everyday. The season of Lent is upon us. A time when so many, like my student, choose to give up something until Easter. I didn't grow up observing Lent. I knew some people who did. My junior year of high school, a guy in my psychology class informed our teacher he had given up talking for Lent. I wasn't so sure about Lent at that point. Because his commitment only lasted about 1 day.
The first time I decided to participate in Lent I was still living in Thailand. I gave up drinking soft drinks. It was difficult. The first week I was offered a Dr Pepper. Let me just say, in Thailand Dr Pepper is hard to come by. Only people with connections to the US Embassy can buy Dr Pepper. I returned to the United States the Saturday before Easter. I was greeted at the airport with a goody basket that included Dr Pepper (my family knows me well). Unfortunately, I had to wait until the next day to enjoy my favorite soft drink.
Last year I decided to give up listening to the radio in my car. At first the silence was nearly deafening. It was hard being trapped with only my thoughts. I had hoped to have great insights during that time of silence. I didn't so much. But I did learn how to enjoy the quiet. In fact, after Easter I had to readjust to sound in my car. And even now, I sometimes turn off the radio and enjoy nothing.
This year is by far the hardest Lent experience for me. I'm counting the days until Easter. And so, I empathize with my student who gave up lollipops. It is hard to sacrifice something you like. But I am hopeful that this experience will provide awareness and growth.

Who's there?

I got to leave work early today. Happy Valentine's Day to me! It is a beautiful, sunny day. Quite the contrast to last year. When I arrived home, I was surprised to find my television on when I opened my door. There was a naked woman on the screen. I began to freak out, thinking, "Oh my God, someone has been in my apartment watching porn." There was no way I was going beyond the entry to find out who was in there. So I considered my options.
I closed the door, locked it, then walked over to the apartment office. I was prepared to explain that while I might seem paranoid, I needed someone to come with me as I went in my apartment to look for unwanted intruders. I didn't really like this plan because I don't want anyone to see the state of my apartment right now. I mean, I was planning on cleaning it today. Really.
When I explained that my TV was mysteriously on, they suggested that it was a result of an earlier power-failure. This sounded logical to me. So I accepted the explantion and bravely returned to my apartment to enter. Alone. Once in the apartment, I realized that the clocks were indeed flashing. And the movie was not actually porn, but simply a movie on cable. Though I've seen Laurel Canyon, and it's pretty bad.

just another

Last year was one of my best Valentine's Days ever. It snowed, and I didn't change out of my pajamas or leave my apartment the entire day. This year I'm not so lucky. I have to go to work. Other than that, I'm not really worried about this holiday that so many single women dread.
I like Valentine's Day. I get to wear red which is a good color on me. As a kid, I enjoyed making my box and exchanging valentines at school. Now as a teacher, I got enough valentines to wallpaper my bathroom. I also got 2 boxes of chocolates, 1 cupcake, 3 frogs and a bear. My kids love me...
I've had a boyfriend for a few Valentine's Days, but I think it is worse than being single. There is all this pressure on him and on me. To plan something romantic, buy something romantic, make the day special. When I think back on my most romantic dates, none of them include Valentine's Day.
I've heard my friends refer to February 14th as Single Awareness Day. Or they wear black and protest the Hallmark-created, commericalized holiday that is designed for people to buy over-priced flowers and sappy love cards. Yes, it may be true that it is a commercialized holiday. But what holiday isn't?
So this year, I'll wear red or pink for Valentine's Day. And I'll take time to remember the people in my life that I love or have loved. Maybe I'll even send a Valentine or two. A friend of mine sent a link for when Hallmark just doesn't have a card to convey the right message. My favorites include: Unimaginative, You'll Do, and Prick.
Happy Valentine's Day!

cam's relationship rant

Tonight at dinner a discussion which seemed more like an argument began regarding dating. Two of my friends believe that guys have become lazy when it comes to dating. They argued that too often guys just hang out with girls until the girl says "I like you, let's go out". The two guys at the table argued back that it is an egalitarian system. Whoever realizes there is an attraction first, should be the one to initiate something more. They said that girls need to be direct about their feelings rather than using subtle hints. I agree with them.
It was an interesting discussion. Though I wasn't really participating. Mostly because I agreed with both sides of the arguments. I think girls should be more direct. Girls shouldn't just wait back hoping a guy will talk to them, ask for their telephone number, then ask them out, etc. If he isn't getting it and you really are interested, then sometimes you have to decide to take a chance. But I also agree that guys should quit bitching about their dating situations when they aren't doing anything to ask girls out. Guys are never going to have a date if they don't take action. At least let her know that you are interested. Girls are much more likely to respond if they think they have a chance to win the gamble. Because really, it is all a game of risk. And it sucks when you lose, but it is great when you win.
Being direct can be good, but the flirtation and uncertainty can be exciting also. But when you are ready to figure out what is going on, you can use the following:
dear____________,
i've really enjoyed hanging out with you more and more lately. i don't want to mess up our friendship, but i also think you are a really great guy (or girl). to say it straight, i'd be interested in seeing if this friendship develops into more. but if that's not where you are, let me know. it will save us a lot of trouble and complication.
I can't guarantee that you won't mess up the friendship. Or that you will get the relationship will work out like you hoped. But it is honest and direct. I don't know if it should be the guy or the girl who starts the relationship (or ends the relationship). I don't really care as long as from start to end it is honest and open without questions unanswered.
And if it is someone you don't know, then take a risk. Because really, you've got nothing to lose. Unless you are sitting at a blackjack table so that you can flirt with someone. Then you really can lose...

Hooked on Yoga

This weekend I went to a Yoga class for the first time. It was an amazing and intense experience. It was exactly what I needed. I loved that it was physical, mental and spiritual. I left feeling completely exhausted, yet also renewed with energy. Now I'm hooked. I'm planning on going back tomorrow night. And I've looked up the possible Yoga times offered at my gym. I might just be willing to get up early to attend the 8:30 class on Saturday mornings. It was that good.

"What kind of scary-ass clowns came to your birthday parties?"

Unlike most Americans, I was not watching the Super Bowl this evening. There was a time when the Super Bowl was a big deal. I looked forward to the party, the game, the halftime show and, of course, the commercials. But I didn't watch it for two years while I lived in Thailand, and now I've got Journey on Sunday nights.
This week after Journey, the 10 of us who were there went out to dinner afterwards. The game was on all the TVs, so I still got to watch some of it. I think I might have been the only one in our group paying any attention to it at all. I cheered when a touchdown was made. When it was the Eagles and then the Patriots. I saw a good commerical or two. But most of the people on my end of the table were more preoccupied with Ziggy the Clown.
Ziggy was a very scary looking clown sitting on a swing inside a box. Every once in a while he would start to swing back and forth or shake side to side. For a quarter, his box promised he would talk. It was unnerving. Yet we couldn't help but wonder what it was he would say. And so one friend decided to give a quarter to Ziggy and hear what he had to say. It was rather loud in the bar, so we couldn't really hear Ziggy talk. But he did give her an egg. And inside the egg was a home-boy for Jesus. It was sweet. Well worth the quarter.
And then my friend gave me a quarter. So once again we strained to hear what Ziggy would say. I listened carefully as he said, "I've got an egg for you." Such a let down. And then carnival music started playing. The exact kind you might hear before the killer clown attacks innocent people. Well, the egg Ziggy gave me had a little, orange lamb on a clip. So I clipped my lamb to my key ring. Hey, it was only a quarter. And it wasn't my quarter.

movie marathon-part 2

I've just gotten home from seeing movie #4. Ray was as good as I expected it to be. Jamie Foxx really did an amazing job. And now I feel like I should add Ray Charles to my music collection. Maybe I'll just buy the Ray soundtrack.
Next weekend my friend's movie marathon will continue. I'm not sure I'll be able to go with her. But I do still have my own list of Oscar nominees to see.
The Aviator
Closer
Vera Drake
Being Julia
Kinsey
So many movies, so little time.

movie marathon

Today I was at the movie theater from 10:30am until 6:30pm. In an effort to see all the big Oscar nominated films, my movie obsessed friend mapped out 6 movies to see this weekend. She warned that the movie marathon would not be for the weak, and added that she would be super-impressed if anyone made it through all 6 with her. It was hard to resist that challenge. But considering I've already seen Sideways, I felt there was really no point. So I am only seeing 4. But 4 movies in 1 weekend is still a lot of movie-watching. Especially if you are short like me. My feet just dangle off the chair which means by the end of one movie my knees hurt. So by the end of the third movie I was surprised I could walk.
I met my friend this morning for Million Dollar Baby. That isn't exactly the best way to start your day. Watching the movie was a beating. Afterwards, I felt like I needed time to process the movie. Unfortunately, there was no time. Our next movie was starting within 10 minutes. And so we met another friend and proceeded to watch Finding Neverland. This movie was so great. Within 10 minutes of the film, I decided I would buy it when it comes out on DVD. After Finding Neverland we had an hour to grab some food before the next movie. Although I wasn't too hungry, since my friend and I had both packed snacks in our largest purses. We said good-bye to one friend and hello to another. It was time for movie #3. Hotel Rwanda was an amazing and powerful film. Though not as uplifting as Finding Neverland. I kind of feel like sitting and working through the tragedy portrayed in this film. Instead, I've got to get ready for a Mardi Gras party.
My friends headed off to see Sideways and Kinsey. But I'll see them again tomorrow. When we meet again at the movie theater to see Ray.