left behind

I am not referring to the end-of-the-world Christian book series. However, for many my own reference to feeling "left behind" might be just as frightening. I'm talking about relationships. For a long time, most of my friends were single just like me. Sure they might date, but none of them were really in serious relationships. Then one day, I realized that had changed. Many of my friends now have boyfriend/girlfriends. And I don't even know how it happened.
I'm happy for these friends, of course. But with the recent news of a friend's engagement and my cousin's engagement, I have to ask myself, "What about me?" Here I am, on the brink of 31 and still single. For many women, it's their worst nightmare. However, for the most part it's been easy being single in the city. Until I recently started seeing all the couples...
Sometimes I like to tell myself (and others) that I'm not anxious about getting married. That I'd be happy just to have a boyfriend. While there may be an element of truth in that, it's not the complete truth. I do want to get married. I like the idea of having someone to spend my life with. Someone to go through the daily routine of life with, but also someone to experience all of the new adventures with.
Maybe this is what prompted me to try the online dating scene again. So far, I've gone on one very successful date. We're already going out again. Already it feels easy and natural despite the fact that we met online. But I find myself wary of getting my hopes up. I worry I'm just projecting my hopeful expectations on the situation. I find myself trying to quiet my own inner cynic. To just relax and enjoy the process. Who knows? Maybe I will finally find "the one" and no longer be left behind.