Who is cam?

The first blog I read was written by a guy I dated before Thailand. My life seems to center around this idea: Before Thailand (BT) and After Thailand (AT). Perhaps this is because one of my biggest fears is that this will be the most interesting aspect of my life. And I'm only 25.
Three years ago I took a risk. I had the chance to move to Thailand, and I took it. I didn't even hesitate. I was offered a job, I accepted it, and three weeks later I moved there. I was more scared of not taking the opportunity than I was of moving half-way around the world from my friends, family and life as I knew it. It was great. I loved it and decided to stay another year. And now I'm back in the United States. I've been back for over a year. Yet, I can't seem to move beyond that experience. I talk about it. To strangers. Just last week, when I was standing in line to vote I found myself telling the man behind me all about living in Thailand. Why? Because it is interesting. When I started sharing about my life now, it seemed a lot less interesting.
I'm actually a lot busier now than BT and in Thailand. My social life is crazy busy. Maybe because after living so far from my friends, I learned how important it is to surround myself with friends. Especially ones who speak English. Since moving back, I've also actually had a dating life. In Thailand I never dated. The Thai men didn't speak enough English and I value good conversation. The American/English speaking men dated Thai women. I couldn't win. Ironically, I've had one serious relationship AT, and he left me to move to Taiwan and will most likely become one of the guys who wouldn't have dated me in Thailand. Seems he likes the idea of finding a Taiwanese honey.
Sometimes it feels like I'm still readjusting to life. I miss living in a big city. I'm probably not going to live in a city bigger than Bangkok. I also miss the warm weather year round. But I'm adjusting to life now. Trying to accept what it is. My life in Thailand steered me to the path I'm on now. I would have never pursued teaching, but my teaching experience in Bangkok made me realize I really like teaching. But if this is true, why can't I be happy as teachercam? I think it is because dreamercam worries about settling. Becoming complacent. Never pushing myself to take another risk.
I liked the idea of starting a blog. But I worried whether I had anything worth writing. Even though I write emails all day long and always have something to say. In an email conversation with a blogger friend, she encouraged me not to worry so much. And to just start writing. I'm also trying to get over the idea that when I write it needs to be either 1. funny or 2. insightful. Instead, I just plan to make my writing honest and real.